
Well, let me do a little myth busting for you. Super mom? She doesn't exist, period. I bet if you asked the "Super mom" in your life how she gets it all done in a day she would breathlessly assure you that she doesn't. The truth is, no one can do it all, something's gotta give. If you are an incredible cook, likely your house does not always look like the cover of a magazine. If you are a great housekeeper, your kids probably eat boxed food a bit more often. If you are a helpful mom, always involved with homework, volunteering, playing games, practicing sports with your kid; chances are maybe both your house and your dinner table suffer a little. As mom's we delude ourselves into thinking that we have to be able to be able to do it all, ALL the time, and look good doing it. I am here to tell you it is simply not possible. I don't know where the idea of super mom first originated (June Cleaver, Mrs. Cosby, at least Mrs. Brady had Alice:) but the idea of her is so ingrained in many mom's heads that we set the bar so high we can only fail. Even if, by some chance, you are able to keep your house spotless, your dinner always fresh/healthy, your kids clean and always in line, your husband happy, all of this while looking like Brooke Shields, something will break. That break will be you, because if you can manage to do all of that all the time- YOU will suffer. It is important to take some time for yourself, daily if you can manage it, and there simply aren't enough hours in the day. Even Wonder Woman, who had actual super powers, had to have an "alternate identity" to escape.
So today, I am kicking super mom to the curb. She can take a hike, I am tired of her being in my head making me feel guilty about what I don't get done in a day, rather than focusing on what I do do (teehee, just for you Paige:). Those of you who try to live up to the expectations in your head, at least the ones that are unrealistic, give them up. I am 100% certain that you are an awesome mom, wife, woman, don't set yourself up for failure by striving for the impossible. Take each day in stride, do what you can but always take the time to love on your kids, snuggle your hubby, read your book; even if that means dishes in the sink and laundry in the hamper. These are the things that make our lives special, the things that matter. The measure of our lives will not be tallied in wash loads and home cooked meals, I assure you. For any of you who may be a self proclaimed (even if it's in your own head:) "Super mom"- give yourself a break, take a minute to breathe, it's ok to do it. All of us have our areas of strength, our areas of weakness, every woman is different. Lets put that "C" word away, embrace ourselves and each other for who we are, not who we think we should be. Ultimately, I think we will find a little bit of super mom in all of us.
First of all, dishes in the sink and laundry in the hamper feels like an accomplishment to me (as opposed to dishes on the table and laundry flung around every bedroom and bathroom). Second of all (since I had a first of all and all) I couldn't agree more. I'm kicking her to the curb today too. I'm taking some ME time. In my pj's. With a big hunk. (And no, I don't mean my husband... I mean an actual Big Hunk candy bar. Judge if you must.)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Renee for giving my a guilt-free day. I'm going to concentrate on what I do do (LOL on that one by the way) most days and take some time away from it, for me. Right now.
Love you!
Such an unbelievably TRUE statement! I have spent most of my adult life trying to attain Super Mom status only to feel completley overwhelmed and unsuccessfull in that area. There are only so many hours in a day.... I work 50+ hours a week generally and then come home and try to maintain a perfect home, happy and healthy children, "satisfied" and happy husband/marriage (if you get my drift on that one)then..........................there is me WAY over here at the end. More often than not the "Me" portion of the day is lost in the shuffle at the end of the 24 hour day. (truth be told a lot of times I run out of steam after the happy children part) So, even though I try my best, there are generally dishes in the sink, many loads of laundry to do and bathrooms/bedrooms that desperatly need a good scrubbing. This should not be considered a failure but be considered "just life". One of my favorite country songs says it best... "sounds like life to me.....". I probably will continue to always strive for the mythical super mom title, even though I know it doesnt exist. I will however make more of an effort to skip a few steps in my day, thus leaving more time for the "me" portion more often. One thing I can say is that some how, amungst my crazy life, I have managed to raise wonderful, respectful, happy, healthy kids; as well as have a wonderful relationship with a amazing man who is still, after 9 years together, the love of my life. Those are ultimaley the most important things anyway... the dishes can rot in the sink for all I care... as long as I have Love in my life and happiness in my heart. ;-) Love you Nay.. again a wonderful Blog. ~Sam
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