GOD-Reality

"What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, not to be so preoccupied with getting so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way He works fuss over these things, but you know God & how He works. Steep yourself everyday in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. You'll find your everyday human concerns will be met. Don't be afraid of missing out. You're my dearest friends! The Father wants to give you the very kingdom itself."

~Luke 12:29-32, The Message

Sometimes reading something over and over opens your eyes to new things, sometimes reading a different translation of something does the same. That's what happened to me this afternoon, I was reading in my Message bible from Luke and these verses jumped out at me like they were written in neon flashing ink. I am learning, through study, prayer, conversations with friends who are willing to "say it straight", counseling, quiet evaluation and self-reflection that I have spent most of my life steeped in a "Neener-reality". My view of God was so wrapped up in my view of myself; I felt invisible so surely God didn't see me, I felt ungifted so surely God didn't give me any gifts, I felt judged so surely He judged me, I was afraid so surely God wasn't my provider/protector...you see where I'm going with this. It never occurred to me that perhaps my perception was what wrong, not the Bible, teachers, my parents or anyone else who tried to give me a glimpse of who God is. So much of our lives are shaped by what we feel at any given moment; how people make us feel, how we feel about ourselves...I wonder why it is so hard to dig deep, immersing ourselves in His word to learn how he feels about us. This is what I have strived to do in recent months, lay aside my own notions of who I am and therefore who God is and seek to find the answers he has for me. I needed to stop focusing on all the things I wanted and felt I wasn't getting, not just from God, but from my husband, family, friends, church, etc... and start focusing on what God has given me. I have been blessed beyond measure, found joy unspeakable and a fountain of peace waiting for me, all I had to do was trust and believe.

This is one verse I love to read to remind myself of how much God delights in me (& you)...

"For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty Savior! He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love he will calm your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs!" Zephaniah 3:17 NIV (emphasis mine)