My Dreams

     I (very) recently watched Danny Silk (if you don't know who he is click here) speak about dreams and how important they are to living an abundant life. He talked about how "God made an investment in you (me), giving us talents and desires, and then invited you (me) into his strength". He told the story of the bags of gold (Matthew 25:14-30), if you are not familiar with the story I'll give you a quick synopsis. A master gives to three servants three separate sums of money before leaving on a trip, to the first he gives five bags of gold, to the second, two bags and to a third, one bag. When he returns, he calls his servants to him to see what they have done with the money he entrusted to them. The first and second servants invested their money and doubled what they were given. The third, in fear, buried his in the ground, returning to his master the one talent he was given. The master becomes angry with the servant and gives his bag of gold to the one made ten bags and throws him out. The point was that the servant who made double his master's investment dreamed big, whereas the one who made nothing had no dreams, fear caused him to hide his gift away, his only plan for his life was that of survival.

     When Danny first started speaking I (inside my head, thankfully:) began to panic, thinking that I didn't have any dreams. Was I living a life less abundant? Was I playing it safe? Were my plans for this life simply to survive? The truth is, prior to a year ago that is exactly where I have been. Life has a way of getting us down if we are not on the watch and I had allowed circumstances to cloud my vision, hide my dreams from me and kick my life a little into "safe & survival" mode.  As Danny said, "dreams require courage". Courage is something the third servant lacked, courage is something I have struggled with much of my life. 

    Thankfully, I serve a God who is bigger than my fears. A God, who with his endless patience and love, has begun to drive out those fears (1 John 4:17-18). Courage has begun to well up within me and I, every so slowly it feels at times, have begun to step out more.  After my moment of panic, many dreams came flooding back into my memory. God  has given me desires, passions and talents make me uniquely suited to live the life he has for me, a life of abundance and joy. Here are a few of the dreams that came to mind, I thought I would share them with you.

1. To learn to play piano

2. To sing again, in some capacity for the Lord

3. To go on the mission field

          *with my husband

          *with my family

4. To teach about creation and evolution (a biologist's view of why the theory isn't so hard packed & how many who believe have misconceptions of God that they feel "support" their ideas) to young people

5. To write, a book...something

6. To go to Ireland and Africa (I would actually love to travel to many places but these are the two I have dreamed of since I was a girl)

7. To climb a mountain

8. To see Alaska radically transformed by supernatural grace

9. To climb a mountain

10. To float (in a boat of course) among a pod of whales and watch them leap out of the water

11. To pray for someone and see them healed

12. To travel all up and down the east coast of the US with my family

These are a few that came to mind immediately, some are God-related, some are not so much. All are desires of my heart, I intend to spend time in prayer and searching my heart for more, then to write them down. Sometimes, as a stay at home mom with young kids, it is easy to lost sight of those dreams we held as young women. It's ok, and I am perfectly content, that these are not all dreams that will happen right away. This season of my life is nearly entirely focused on my family and I love that I am able to do that. I simply want to remember my dreams, because I know that the next phase of life may see some come true, and maybe a few more in the phase after that. I intend to position myself in life to be ready, whatever God's timing, to see them come true, because he wants to see my dreams come true. He loves us that much, he's a good father :).

What are some dreams you have?

While I Haven't Been Blogging...

I need to start this blog with a big, heart felt, apology to my readers. I have not been good...at all, about blogging the past few months, not only because I had stuff going on but because I was struggling with feeling like no one read it much anyway, so why bother? There, I said it, I am determined to be honest with the people in my life which means saying even the "not so flattering" things that enter my mind. Somewhere along my blogging journey I got the notion that my blog would gain popularity and I would become one of "those" bloggers, you know, the ones with lots of followers, people gushing praise for various posts, etc...etc...blah blah blah. I am aware that I am probably not the first person who has though this but I am aware that, for me, I'd just assume not operate under delusions of grandeur. After much soul searching and examination of my own heart I realized that it really didn't matter to me if one or one hundred people read my blog. If anything I have to say in my ramblings can impact one heart, isn't it enough? If I can share a little piece of me, what God has done in my life, the sweet things I love about my boys, and make one person smile, reflect on their own life, evaluate their heart; isn't that a big deal? So, my friends, please accept my sincerest apologies for giving up on you because you weren't "enough", believe me, it was my issue not yours :). I hope you can forgive me. 

NOW, what have I been doing these past few months? Here are a few highlights from my past few months...

I went to Family Camp for the first time and LOVED it. God never ceases to amaze me, touch my heart & bless me with awesome family and friends..

The girls before the "Amazing Race"

Sweet boys playing super heros...

I went on our annual Girls Camping Trip with great family/friends. This year Isaiah re-dubbed it the "Momma & Kids Camping Trip", since he & his brother are not girls :)...

Goofy kids walking to the river over the bridge...

Me and my boys on Montana Creek...

I attended a big family BBQ & birthday celebration for a little guy who was a big answer to prayer....

The birthday boy, Josiah David

Isaiah, Zion & Reece playing together outside. Cousins are the best!

The boys and I went went to Anchorage and spent the night with my friend and her boys for a "Momma & Son" trip. We visited the "Imaginarium" while we were there....

All of us in front of the body heat reader...

I said goodbye to a much loved uncle. I love you Uncle Mick, miss you much and will see you again someday!....

Me and my Uncle at my cousin's wedding in '04.

Mick out hunting, his favorite thing...

I took my nephews to climb a mountain! It was tough but so worth the view and time together...

On top of the mountain!

I went to Soldotna to visit old friends and we saw a parade, caught fish and had a wonderful time visiting together!...

Isaiah and Koen, good buddies!

The guys and their catch of the night!

I had people over to play in our new sandbox and sit around the fire pit visiting...

Josh loves to hang out around the fire!

FIRE!

I took some walks with some pretty terrific kids...

Sweet kids!

I was TOTALLY surprised by one of my bestest besties who cam to visit. My husband had arranged for it all as an anniversary gift, we had a GREAT week! AND we got to go flying, so cool!

I celebrated 11 years of marriage to my best friend. I love him more now than I did 11 years ago!

I sent my sweet baby boy to kindergarten, it was tough to walk away but he was SO ready and SO excited to be there! I trust the Lord with my guy while he's out of my reach and will cherish the time I get to spend with Joshua one on one.

So, there you have it. What I've been up to when I haven't been here, in a nutshell...or rather a photo collage. I am excited to begin blogging again, for all the right reasons, the reasons I started blogging in the first place. To share a little of my heart, my life, my kids with others and to keep some record of it all myself.